Energy = MASS x the speed of light squared

Force = MASS x acceleration

The coneheads consumed MASS quantities of food and beer.

Those are all examples of ways you wouldn't mind hearing the word 'MASS' in a sentence. It's only when you put the word 'mass' together with words like 'pelvic' and 'MRI' and 'biopsy' that it starts sounding kind of scary and sinister.

Apparently I have some unidentified 'thing' in my pelvis that is going to have to be biopsied in the near future. My doctor has no idea what it is -- it doesn't look like anything she'd typically expect to find in that region. A friend of mine has helpfully pointed out that it's better for her to say that she doesn't know what it looks like than for her to say, 'hey! that looks exactly like a cancerous tumor!'. I have to agree with her on that one.

You know what else is scary? When someone schedules an appointment for you to go over your test results and suggests that you bring your Significant Other along with you. Apparently this is not entirely unusual -- I know because the second time someone said that to me, I asked 'do you say this to everyone?' and was told that yes, they do say that to everyone - which I think they should mention to you right off the bat. Like so: "Now don't freak out because we say this to everyone, but bring someone with you to your appointment."

Don't Panic.

Panic would be counterproductive anyway.

And do you know what else I've learned? I'm not sure it's possible to maintain a state of panic or even high anxiety for a very long time. It's exhausting. It's been about a week now since my doctor first discovered the MASS, and I still don't know what it is...but I'd say my anxiety level has steadily dropped -- well, after peaking about an hour before I got my MRI results. I hope I never have a reason to discover whether I'm right in my theory that you can't panic long-term.

I'll keep you posted on what happens.

Wish me luck.