I think it's possible that the only creatures weirder than boys are kittens. I acquired one of these beasts over the summer, mostly for the purpose of keeping my grown cat company while I'm away. I've long thought that cats and kittens are so different as to almost be two separate species. They metamorphose, as in caterpillar to butterfly. You don't think of a caterpillar as a baby butterfly, and you shouldn't think of a kitten as a baby cat. You should think of it as a baby monster.

For one thing, kittens have a quota of things they have to knock over per day. My particular kitten, a darling little orange thing that I named Munch, has an especially high quota. If she can knock said items over on top of my head...well, that's just a bonus.

Munch loves me. If I am in the apartment, Munch wants to be near me. Or on me. And if I try to walk away from her, she makes it her business to wrap herself around my legs and trip me. And since I do enjoy being adored, I love Munch back...from about 7:30am until 2:00am. It's the wee hours of the morning when I find myself plotting mayhem, murder, and wanton kitten abuse. That's about the time when she gets what my sister calls 'The Rips'. To have 'The Rips' means to have an overwhelming need to barrel through the house, yard, or airport (as the case may be) for no apparent reason and with no specific destination in mind. This results in Munch barreling right across my head repeatedly while I'm trying to sleep. And then when she gets tired of that, she jumps onto the mantle above my bed to get a head start on the day's quota of knocking things over. Onto my head.

I do understand that all of this is typical kitten behavior and I know that she'll grow out of it. What I don't really understand though is why exactly she feels the need to excavate the other cat's feces from the litter box and leave them on the bathroom rug. I can only assume she feels that Allie's waste is fouling HER litter box. She is, after all, the Queen. At the very least she's a Duchess or a Princess.

I think she's going to be a great cat when she grows up. She's very affectionate and I've always wanted a lap cat...but wish us all luck at surviving her kittenhood.

And send coffee. Lack of sleep is starting to wear on me.